⓱apple – The Return of Jony Ive and The ‘Reality Distortion Field’

When Steve Jobs passed he took his “reality distortion field” with him. Apple could certainly use a modicum of that superpower now. ‘Antenna-Gate‘ seems minor compared to the months-long shitstorm over the iPhone 7 missing audio jack.
Deleting the ubiquitous and beloved headphone jack on its flagship product has proven spectacularly unpopular with the media. At the Sept 7 Special Event it will be confirmed as fact and prominently announced to the public. There remains only one person at Apple who can provide the necessary smoke and mirrors to minimize this potential marketing fiasco  – enter Sir Jonathan Ive.

An iconic Jony Ive video was once the staple of every the Apple Special Event: his familiar accent framing the words “incredibly thin” and “aluminium“; the sterile white surroundings of his super secret laboratory; cut to the slick computer animation of Apple’s latest proprietary technology; cut back to the live stage with Tim Cook and “it’s available today. You’re gonna love it”. Magic. Cash registers chime out in glee.

Since his recent promotion and title change Jony’s been conspicuously absent from the keynotes and reportedly scarce at Apple own Cupertino headquarters. He’s been completely out of the limelight other than the occasional fashion show or British knighting. His last video sighting was for the iPhone 5C introduction way back in September 2013 (“it’s unapologetically plastic“, remember?).

So now Apple must bring Jony back in an attempt to warp our perception and reshape reality. Despite his abundant charm and persona the doubters will be plentiful and vociferous. Time, however, will prove that Apple was right to drop this century old analog technology. He will wow  us with the superior sound reproduction from the digital lightning port. He’ll unveil a yet unmanned chip that gives superior connectivity compared to the current Bluetooth. And he’ll show off his new wireless earphones with the”AirPods” moniker.

We’re all in agreement that the future is wireless – but only Apple has the vision to choose the pathway to get there. And only Jony can deliver this message.